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I think I did something to piss Mary off. Maybe not, maybe she was just pissed in general. I hope it's the latter. She's a good kid, and I don't want to lose her friendship.
Of course, I have no real reason to think I pissed her off. I don't remember anything that irritated or even remotely offended her. She was perfectly fine yesterday and I didn't have much interaction with her today. I asked her if she was alright twice, since she seemed upset, but she snapped back that she was fine. I left her alone after that. She was probably just having a rough day or something. I hope so. See, I'm not as worried that she hates me as I am that I could be helping her... unless of course it's about me, then I just want to know so I can get out of her way.
How egocentric is that of me, to assume that her problems are caused by my idiocy? I do, however, have an odd personality trait that any long exposure to me drives people absolutely insane. Thinking back, the only people who haven't rebelled against my existence after six months or less of heavy Andy exposure are those two girls whom I've married.
And one of those relationships only lasted a total of about three years before it ended! She was dirty, though, and I'm better for that one. If only that bitch had tired of me sooner!
Think of it: if you read this blog and you've spent a bit of concentrated time in my presence, you've at one point or another gotten exceptionally tired of my shit and declined to spend more time with me. I realize this truth: I'm as radioactive as a nuclear a-bomb. Just my being in the room makes people sick. Only Amy seems to have the correct genetic tolerance to last in my presence. I wonder sometimes if I'm weakening her immunity... and running toward the inevitable.
I certainly hope not. If so, I will probably move myself to some remote place and live out my days in a way that won't threaten anyone else.
I don't know. In some ways, I wish I had a personality that was more likeable in the long term. In other ways, I'm like "fuck you!" to whoever doesn't want to hang with me.
All of this stupid thought... caused by Mary having a bad day that may not even be remotely related to my existence.
And I wonder why people get tired of me? Oh yeah, because I'm a fuckin' idiot who overanalyzes everything and [sometimes mis]construes it to be about me. Heh. This is one reason I've come to dislike (and be scared of) socializing so much!
Posted by Your Friendly Neighborhood DJ on March 14, 2006 09:44 PM | Permalink
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