I really have nothing to do right now. All of my homework is caught up, my class is prepped for, and it's only about 9:26. Ugh. I got this one through a bulletin from Scottie too Hottie.
1. Do you still know/talk to the person you lost your virginity to?
Um no. I barely ever even get to talk to the woman I'm sleeping with these days, so why would I have time for that bitch's skanky ass?
2. What would you do with 1,000 plastic spoons?
Eat lots of Snack-Pack Puddings.
3. What kind of music did you listen to in elementary school?
Peter Paul and Mary, the Beach Boys, the Beatles, Blondie, Guns and Roses, various classical, "Weird" Al Yankovic, oldies that my dad subjected me to, Stevie Wonder.
4. What is the best thing about your current job?
I get to research anything I want, I get to teach a class of 80 malcontented students, I get essentially unlimited contact with knowledgeable faculty, I get to take any class I want... AND I get PAID for it.
5. Do you wish cell phone etiquette was a required class?
I require that cell phones are not brought to the class I teach. If it rings, I get to answer it.
6. Are you against same sex marriage?
No. Any human has the right to marry any other human. Based on prior experiences, I'm not sure why they'd want to necessarily marry, but these days I can see the reasons. I think it's a matter of civil rights to allow anyone the benefits of marriage... if they really want in on it, let them take the associated risks of possibly being married to a psychopath.
7. Have you been on a date in the past week?
Yeah, Amy and I went to the Cleveland Zoo on Sunday.
8. Where are you going on your next vacation?
We might be going to Niagara in a couple weeks when we have a weekend off together, but more than likely we'll be limited to something like Cleveland that weekend. At least we're getting out of town!
9. Quote a song lyric:
"Been around the world and saw that only stupid people are breeding."- Harvey Danger
10. Are most of the friends in your life new or old?
The last friend I actually made, in terms of friends and not a professional relationship was probably Amy. Beyond that, everyone I'm at least quasi-friends with I've known since at least my freshman year of college. I don't make friends very well, but I am fairly loyal.
11. Do you own any furniture made from dead animals?
Sure, anything plastic is made from petroleum which is simply dead animals. I also own a lot of furniture made from dead plants.
12. Do you like your parents?
Yeah, they're all right. They're more of a friend-relationship these days because I'msa all grown up. I guess.
13. Do you still live with them?
Nah, save a couple weeks during the Great Flush of 2003, I haven't lived with them since 2000.
14. What state/country are you from?
Indiana... U.S.A! U.S.A! U.S.A!
15. Tell us about the last conversation you had.
I was telling Amy when I get off work for an afternoon break so she can come get me and we can hang out and eat. I also told her that I loved her and that she should be careful on the way to work as I got out of the car.
16. Where do you see yourself in one month?
Doing the same thing, with one more presentation under my belt, which will happen on October 20 at ELDAAG.
17. What is your favorite smell?
New rubber smell from a tire store. This perfume that Amy wears that means she wants get down.
18. What's your favorite color?
Forest green or sky blue.
19. Do you consider yourself bi-polar?
Sure, that and manic-depressive. I'm fucking nuts.
20. What is the time and the outside temperature at the moment?
9:38 am, 62 degrees Fahrenheit, 16.7 degrees Celsius, 289.8 degrees Kelvin.
21. Have you ever done anything vindictive to your coworkers?
Sure, but not at this job. Which ones? Oh, Wal-Mart, the Ski-Hi Drive-In, Yellow Brick Road Theater, Dollar Movies, in the Geography Department at Ball State, the BSU Learning Center, TIS Bookstore, Bob Evans, McDonalds... among others.
22. Have you ever gone to therapy?
Physical or mental? Guilty.
23. Have you ever Played Spin the Bottle?
Once in like middle school, but girls always left if they got chosen to kiss me. It was an uplifting experience.
24. Have you ever broken into someone's house?
Well, my own and my parents, but that doesn't really count.
25. Have you ever liked someone but never told them?
Well, yeah... who hasn't done this?
26. Have you ever gone camping?
Is this supposed to be scandalous or something? I've gone camping like 600,000 times, including nearly every state west of the Mississippi. Camping rules.
27. Have you ever had a crush on your brother's friend?
Eww, no. My brother is 6 years younger than I am.
28. Have you ever been to a nude beach and if not would you like to go?
No, but I went and hung out on the topless deck of a cruise ship once. It was pretty okay, although most of the titties were disappointing.
29. Have you ever gotten drunk alone?
Sure, when I lived alone. I had a lonely life for a while.
30. Have you ever had sex on the beach?
The drink? Yes. The act? Sounds painful... sand in bad places. Sandpaper wouldn't be pleasant, so how could sand?
31. Have you ever had a stalker?
Yeah, I've had a couple. Random girls have gotten big crushes on me and stalked me for a while when I tried to cut it off. It usually only last a week or so, though. And yes, it was kinda flattering in retrospect.
32. Have you ever been in love?
Yeah, probably too many times. I don't know, I've always thought it's better to fall hard and deal with picking up the pieces later if it doesn't work.
33. Have you ever gone skinny dipping?
Sure. But I won't describe details because my readers might throw up.
34. Have you ever had a threesome?
Nah, I'm not that adventurous.
35. Have you ever laughed so hard you cried?
What does this mean?
36. Have you ever gone to a party where you were the only sober one?
Yeah, when I quit drinking for a while I kept going to parties. It sucked.
37. Have you ever felt betrayed by your best friend?
Well, back during the Great Flush of 2003, the one who was my best friend at the time threw me away. I guess that's betrayal.
38. Have you ever lied to your parents?
Well, yeah. I smoked for like 5 years and my mom's an asthmatic. I drank for quite a while and my mom's a Quaker. She would never be able to understand these things.
39. Have you ever been out of the US?
Yeah. I've been to a few: Canada, Mexico, Belize, Jamaica, The Bahamas, Dominican Republic, Grand Cayman (U.K.), Grand Turk Island (U.K.). I've also seen (at a distance) Honduras, Haiti and Cuba.
40. Have you ever thrown up from working out?
Yeah, when I played baseball my freshman year of high school, I was so out of shape that the workouts made me puke a few times.
41. Have you ever gotten a haircut so bad that you wore a hat for a month straight?
When I was in the sixth grade, I wanted a bowl cut really really bad but didn't have the length. Hilarity ensued.
42. Have you ever eaten 3 meals from 3 different fast food places in 1 day?
Yeah, this happens a lot on road trips.
43. Have you ever gotten so wasted you make your friends leave the bar at like 12 o’clock cause you were gonna pass out?
Well, that hasn't happened at a bar, but once I was driven home from a party at 10:00 pm because I was too drunk to survive.
44. Have you ever spied on someone you had a crush on?
No, not that I know of.
45. Have you ever met someone you only know through myspace?
No, but I met my wife online. Online dating is the only way to go when you're scared to death of social situations.
46. Have you ever slept with one of your coworkers?
Yeah. My ex and I used to work at the same place for a while when we were together. What the fuck was I thinking? No really, what was I thinking the whole time I was with her?
47. Have you ever seen your best friend naked?
Yeah, I mean, I see her naked about every day.
48. Have you ever walked in on your parents having sex?
I wondered why I'm so emotionally fucked up!!! Wait... no, I haven't.
Yes, I wasted my time with this, and now, since you've read this far, so have you.